I saw my privilege
I was once out in a parking lot with a couple of friends after our sports group ended. One, another white woman like myself, the other a black man. He was showing us his awesome pick up and we sat in the back seat, he in the drivers seat, and we hung out there for a few minutes. As a car pulled in I heard my friend remark that she was going to give us the look. I asked "what look?" And he told me she is going to check to make sure you are not in need of help. And when she got out of the car in fact she did. We smiled and nodded we were fine and she walked away.
This COULD be an example of a woman who has been victimized or has a heightened fear of victimization of women; but what told me otherwise is that my friend called it. This means he has experienced it so many times in his life that either a) he has learned to pick up cues or b) he has learned to just expect it. Maybe even both.
It did not surprise me that there is that kind of racism... assumptions like a black man hanging out with a couple of white women means he is up to no good (a problem I recognized, but I was not surprised, I know racism exists)... what really shocked me was that point I made above... he called it, he knew it was coming, and this is just life for him. I was hurt for him. And it isn't fair that he or anyone lives with that